The 12 days of Akatsuki christmas!
by gisella89
Summary: Join the Akatsuki on christmas as they sing the 12 days of christmas... with a spin. They make the lyrics! Merry christmas everyone, and if you like this then check out my Akatsuki one!


**My treat to you all as a christmas present! I also have an Naruto one called 'The 12 days of Naruto christmas' CHECK IT OUT! Review, do whatever in the christmas spirit, and If you want me to do a _xreader I'd totally do it on my deviantart profile! (It's just gisella89) now enjoy!**

Christmas was a drag in Akatsuki-ville.

"But you have to feel SOME Christmas spirit!?" Tobi exclaimed, running over to everyone and shaking them. "Tobi! I'm not celebrating a holiday in the name of some other freaking god, dammit. Now don't make me angry, because when I get angry-!" "Save it." Kakuzu growled "I think christmas is just a waste of money. Buying things for people with your own money for no reason..." "Aww Kakuzu! Don't be such a downer!" Tobi cried. Konan easily kept her usual straight face in the back, surrounded by a huge pile of paper snowflakes. "Hm... I like this paper" She said seriously. Itachi had grudgingly made a cozy fire in the middle of the hideout. Deidara had made a bunch of clay ornaments, and he assured that if you didn't touch them most of them didn't explode. Kisame meanwhile was grinning sadistically in he back for no apparent reason.

Sasori was out, and Zetsu was out with him doing some secret mission or something. "Why the hell isn't there a day for the universe to show their respects to Jashin!?" "Probably because no one respects Jashin but you" Deidara said smugly "Ooh! Nice one Deidara!" Tobi said excitedly "You know what, I'm done with you ********s" Hidan swore madly. "I wasn't aware that that was a word" Itachi said. Konan just sat in the back, cutting paper. Kisame leapt into the conversation. "I bet I've made more swears then even you." He said to Hidan "Yeah right?" "Yeah right!" "Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la, la la la la" Tobi sang, not paying any attention to the other people. Zetsu and Sasori walked in around two minutes later. "Merry Christmas!" Zetsu said. "Stop saying that!" Hidan shouted "I'm not gonna celebrate a holiday in the name of a different f***ing god!" "Oh well" Sasori said.

"OooohoooO~~~~~!" Tobi said, a lightbulb simultaneously appearing above his head. "I have a great idea!" "Hurray, hm, because those always end well" Deidara muttered "Lets do some christmas carols!" "NO." Kakuzu, Deidara, Kisame and Hidan all said in unison. "It might not be so bad." Konan said from the back. "Come on! It'll be fun!" Tobi tried to convince "I'm not singing songs about a different god!" Hidan shouted "Fine, we'll change the lyrics then."

Nobody could argue with that. "I'll pay you fifty dollars to back me up, Kakuzu-san!" Tobi bribed "In that case, it sounds like a wonderful Idea' Kakuzu smirked. "Aww, damn it Kakuzu. You always do anything for a bit of money" Hidan whined. "One second!" Tobi cried. He went out of the room and came back wearing an ugly sweater and holding an Ipod. "What's that?" Sasori asked "It's called and Ipod! And apparently we have them! Let's sing the twelve days of christmas" Tobi suggested. There was a collective groan. "I assume you all know the twelve days of christmas?" Kakuzu asked, just because he needed to for the money. "How could we not" Deidara sighed. "Okay then everyone! I just happen to have the twelve days of christmas karaoke on here!" Tobi said brightly "What in the hell do you do when you're bored" Hidan asked. Tobi looked at Hidan not saying anything, and when he wasn't goofing his menacing-ness was off the chart. "Never mind" Hidan mumbled "I don't wanna know."

Tobi took out nine glasses of wine and handed them to everyone. No body complained as they sipped on their wine. Tobi giggled so hard that he fell on the ground. "Tobi, un?" Deidara wondered. "I- eheheh! I- LOL I- I- drugged your glasses!" He laughed. Everyone put down the innocent looking glasses at once.

"Tobi you fu-" "Hidan!" Kakuzu said, holding back the madman with the scythe. "We've been drugged! Killing him wont make it better. What did you drug us with?" He asked calmly. "CHRISTMAS CHEER!" Tobi exclaimed. "It's made of sugar spice and everything else you need to make it work! It'll take effect in just a minute! So lets start singing!"

Tobi clicked on the Ipod and a tinkly happy tune started playing. "You start, Kakuzu! Now on the first day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~" "All I want is some damn money..." Kakuzu sang in an off tone "On the second day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~" Tobi was leading "Two talking hands" Deidara sang, a simrky smile creeping onto his lips. "And all I want is some damn money!" "On the third day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~ Three yummy dangos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" Tobi was overjoyed at his fellow Akatsuki singing. And everyone else was slowly getting happy too. "Yay!" Tobi cried, then he took out eight more ugly sweaters and pants and stopped the song. "Everyone take off your robes and wear these!" Tobi cried. "Uh, if you stop watching" Hidan said. "You're all so idiotic. We're all familiar with each other. Nothing will be new." Itachi said. "Well, you have to promise not to look at me" Konan said "I'm a girl." "So what?" Sasori said "I'm a puppet, you don't see me complaining." Konan shrugged and they all stripped which was more then awkward. Because some of them hadn't bothered with underwear.

"Itachi..." Deidara giggled "You're-" "Shut it." Itachi replied, grinning.

They all put on christmas sweaters and dorky pants which made them look weird. Of course, Zetsu couldn't put it on but... Tobi pressed play on the ipod and the twelve days of christmas resumed.

"On the fourth day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~ Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" Everyone was actually singing at this point. Everyone. Even Sasori. "On the fifth day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~" "FIVE DISMEMBERED LIIMBS!" Kisame sang. Tobi laughed happily. "Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" "On the sixth day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~" "Six clay ornaments!" Deidara cried "Five dismembered liiimmmbbbss! Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" "On the seventh day of christmas boss-sama gave to me~" "Seven papercuts!" Konan shouted, sucking her thumb. They all thoguht she was immune to papercuts but apparently not. "Six clay ornaments, five dismembered limbs! Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" "On the eighth day of christmas boss-sama gave to me!" "Eight idiot heathens!" Hidan smirked "Seven papercuts, six clay ornaments, fiive dismembered liimmbbs! Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" "On the ninth day of christmas boss-sama gave to me! Nine drugged glasses!" Tobi sang "Eight idiot heathens, seven paper cuts, six clay ornaments, five dismembered liimmbbs! Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and all I want is some damn money!" It went on to ten creepy puppets, eleven paper snowflakes and "Twelve thousand dollars! Eleven paper snowflakes, ten creepy puppets, nine drugged glasses, eight idiot heathens, seven papercuts, six clay ornaments, fiive dismembered LIMBS! Four ugly sweaters, three yummy dongos, two talking hands and ALL I WANT IS SOME DAMN MONEY!" They sang loudly in unison. They all dissolved into laughter, and for some, this was their best christmas ever.

**LIST:**

**1. All I want is some damn money**

**2. Talking hands**

**3. Yummy dongos!**

**4. Ugly sweaters**

**5. Dismembered limbs!~**

**6. Clay ornaments**

**7. Papercuts**

**8. Idiot heathens**

**9 drugged glasses!**

**10. Creepy puppets**

**11. Paper snowflakes!**

**12. Thousand dollars**

MERRY CHRISTMAS!~~~


End file.
